How to Love Unconditionallyby Zara Jane Juan
Loving is easy, giving conditions to love is hard. It's when we put the barriers to love that makes it difficult. So before ending up the beautiful feeling of loving & choose to be cold for the rest of our life, consider some tips on how to love unconditionally:
Tip # 1. Purify your heart.
The impression we make of people hinders our capacity to acknowledge the person's innocence. In our competitive world, children of working parents taught their kids to be careful & not too trusting. This deep seated thoughts became a habit that at the first instance of seeing people, we tend to assess before we give in.
To purify the heart is to develop the habit of trust, not the habit of attachment. These are two different words w/ two different meanings. Attachment is holding, it is dangerous as it results to control and/or emotional dependency.
Trust, on the other hand, is making the conviction to yourself that the person you are loving is innocent. Thus, in unconditional love, it is not the other person's responsibility to make himself or herself trustworthy, it is you who will develop the conviction that he/she is innocent.
Tip # 2. Give in twice as you were given
If the other person who loves you is giving you only 50%, double it and give 100%. If that person is already loving you 100% love him/her by 200%. Loving unconditionally is a release of your emotion inside to do more than just caring.
Caring is done not for yourself gratification but for the other's welfare. Thus, you must be ready to fore go yourself in order to care for the other. If you make this a habit then your learning how to practice loving unconditionally day by day and every second of the day.
Tip # 3. Loving is an act of charity
Sometimes we see charity as something that should only be given to the poor. And that if we see a person is rich materially, physically, intellectually, etc, we tend to think twice if this person still needs an act of charity.
Charity is a gift. Like Christmas gifts, everyone deserves it, whether rich or poor. To love unconditionally is not quantitative or qualitative; no selection; no segregation.
Tip # 4. Loving is a present
If loving is a gift, then it should be given as a present, literally, meaning now at the moment. To love unconditionally is to do it immediately! Say it, do it, right here, right now "or else, the moment will just pass away"
Tip # 5. Loving is forever
Unconditional love doesn't have a contract or a deal that if it breaks, the loving is gone. The person who loves unconditionally let that loving feeling stays even if the person is gone. The rationale behind is that, the feeling was already given and can't be taken back, not even by situations, not even by any person/s, not even by time.
Loving unconditionally is not martyrdom. It is in fact a smart choice to live. When one practices this type of loving, he/she may not get the same feeling of loving to the person he/she loves (and that doesn't matter anyway, as it is called, it's unconditional).
Now, why a smart choice to live? Because, the more you give the loving, the more you get it back. In the same manner, the more conditions you set in before you love someone, the more it is is harder for you to experience being loved.
Caution: In loving unconditionally, you don't get the good karma from the person you love, but you get it from nature, such that you get it from other people or favorable situations. However, don't expect too much, 'coz once you measure your good karma according to the unconditional love your giving, then again your breaking the rule of doing it, which is, to love without expecting anything in return.
